Be The Best Fool You Can Be
Change and pain are your intimate teachers [Part II]
Last week we had [Part I] of this article, if you haven’t read it, click HERE and read Part I first; then Part II will make much more sense.
Where do the bars intersect to make the Cross?
I find myself torn by my present life situation; I am struggling to maintain a balance between my conventional job and my impulse for writing and where it takes me. I closed my eyes and realized I am standing with each foot on two different columns: one is the responsibilities of debts, my living expenses and most importantly my daughters (that I cannot overlook or let go, neither would I want to); the other is my love for life and my aspiration to follow my dream, to respond to a project that calls my passion and all my energy to accomplish it.
It is ambitious and almost impossible for me to make it a reality, but my whole being tells me that if I don’t, I will not complete my life’s journey.
When we are on our deathbed, we regret what we neglected or didn’t do, not so much the mistakes we made.
There is no way to resolve this division, we cannot let go of responsibilities, in my case, especially if there are two girls that depend on me in more ways than one; nor can I let go of what is a step in the right direction towards trying to uncover the reason of why I was born. The only choice is to accept the contradiction and to be a Fool.
I cannot give the energy and dedication to my project, so I have to risk being the clutz that makes mistakes and does things like a high-school junior lad.
Matthew's Calling in the series THE CHOSEN
The answer is easy, but are you up to paying the price?
Once in a Q&A session after a conference, Jim Rohn[1] was asked by a young man, ”how can we make sure we are effective in our attempt of success?” He flatly answered, “increase your rate of failure”. We want to be successful without pain or worries, without failure or disappointment, such a thing is impossible. In fact, the real possibility of failure had better be present to push you forward from behind.
Behind all successful individuals, there are countless hours invested in achieving and perfecting what they are aiming for. When anyone is confronted with a challenge, he or she must muster their best and decide what they want to do and fail at it countless times before success is achieved. The artist makes dozens of sketches (or maybe hundreds) before she can make a masterpiece. Athletes must repeat routines thousands of times with their bodies and in their minds, before winning a race or a match.
The ultimate secret to success is hard work, determination and the willingness to make yourself be a fool, so you can eventually succeed.
The real problem is deciding what you want (follow up from I Chose to Learn a skill)
What in the world is stopping me from deciding to push forward? If I have made up my mind, there will be no obstacle big enough that could stop me. What transparent benefit is holding me in whatever situation I am in, so I don’t take charge and finally do that simple task that can potentially change everything in my life?
Just like I did, ask the question again and again and answer it every single time.
- It keeps me accountably free.
- I am not alone; I am part of the whole group of people that is not making it.
- I cannot fail if I don’t completely commit, it keeps me guilt-free.
- If I succeed, I will pay a price.
- I will be faithful to someone’s characterization of me.
(I am the small one and can’t do big things).
I can always say to myself, “stop this babble and push your weight forward!” Or rather, I can tell myself: I hear you, you have nothing to fear my lonely boy, I will take charge of us and guide us to a better and more rewarding place than the one you fear you are at. Either one is a good approach, it really boils down to your temperament and personal disposition.
However, I like to suggest that most of the time we pressure ourselves too much and are very critical. If there is more than one ME inside, why not be gentle and guide him/her out of that dreadful place it fears to leave? No matter how harsh or unsettling, it is a place that is well known. It can be a stuck child who was not given the space to say I am afraid, or I don’t really want to. But then again you, the adult, assume the challenge. It doesn’t matter the resistance or obstacle that we face in trying to accomplish the objective.
@GerdAltmann at Pixabay
We have an unforeseen ally, our nature.
Life prevails! It is a maxim that will guarantee to be your best coach. Nothing stops life from sprouting and growing. You can see it in a reinforced concrete support wall of a bridge twenty meters high above ground level. Right in the middle of the tall wall there is a crack, and from it a green leaf springs out attesting “this is home”.
In us, the biggest obstacle is our mind. Our internal discourse sets the interpretation frame for all that we see and do. Things change and that variation causes certainty or a challenge. Life is a continuous process of deaths and rebirths, we must keep at it, the pains and little deaths train us to live and prepare us for the worst.
We can decide to suck up the pain and see where it leads, or we may dodge and disconnect from the outer chaos. Choose the former and lean into the pain, it will open possibilities you could have never even dreamed of.
It’s ok to get burned, you will survive.
Become the Fool, that is the first door to becoming the Hero
There are dragons we must face, in order to complete ourselves and our life. We don’t see them as such because we lack the amplitude of vision to understand that the battle we are fighting is the oldest battle of humankind: Evil against Good. Or we could say, Chaos against Order, or Destruction against Creation; our lives and bodies are the battleground of the oldest confrontation in the Cosmos.
But me, personally, why am I stumbling to learn and be proficient in a skill that can turn everything around? Why not finally decide, and come what may, push forward and let the Dragon kill me or I kill the Dragon, and gather the treasure and create beauty out of its blood?
I don’t know – What do I know really? Risk it, be the fool…and act. You will suck at first, you will fumble and make a jest of yourself. Better to lose your pride than the opportunity!
@morzaszum at Pixabay
Become the ideal
No matter how many times you fall, pick your bones up and carry on. Do it over and over again, fall again and start over every time.
For me, I try to convince myself that it is what I want, what I need; only to fail again. Why is this an obstacle? Why have I made this into a monster of transcendental proportions?
I have intuitions; but truly, I don’t know.
I feel like a dog that is going to lay on a cushion and circles around and around to find the position to lay and be. I write, read, think, and ask myself questions, attempting the best I can to discern and come to the decision to push forward and DO IT. In the final analysis, I am only risking to be seen and recognized as a fool.
I know not how; I know not when… but I know I will!
I will keep pushing forward, as best I can and accept my falls with as much grace as I can accept my wins. Something inside me is telling me this is my next step, my next Dot, even if I die without achieving it. Mainly, because I push this battle forward; and maybe, just maybe, it will be easier for my daughters or the next generation.
[1] Emanuel James Rohn (*1930 +2009), professionally known as Jim Rohn, was an American entrepreneur, author and motivational speaker. (Wikipedia)